well fourteen years later and it seems this is how we will celebrate my second born's birthday.it's not a big deal if i saw them everyday but it isn't always expedient timing, with the other's major exam around the bend.
but it isn't so bad seeing them on the long weekend either as it gives me more time to catch up at a leisurely pace.i just hope we can do this right without too many glitches
funny how it was only a year when we made a big event of it at the ex's place.she took the day off and made preps with such effort and attention i was humbled.on my side i tried to fix a decent looking dinner.it was then that i was assured we could do this as partners because i was possibly moved by her love and devotion.sadly this didn't seem enough internally because i really couldn't accept who she was as a person.i tried believe me but some things are just harder than they should be.too much buried resentment and disdain.
so now i look back and like the glitch in my weekend plans which turns out better because i didn't book a getaway on the weekend i was told last minute about swap in duties, i could also look at this present moment as better for everyone. i'm sure she has moved on and found her peace. for me it takes time to train myself mentally not to regress.it has to be about the worthwhile causes in life, where you make another happy and love them despite.if i ever achieve that it would be a new accomplishment.my track record has shown how i flounder quite horribly in that department
No comments:
Post a Comment